PERSONAL JOURNAL:
SIN (Conviction): Father, I have two confessions to make to You today for sin I have committed against You. The first is that I have not been the obedient, consistent follower of Christ as I had been over the last 14 months. I have been struggling quite a bit with my quiet times, with contentment, with just enjoying life as a whole lately for some reason and I’m not really sure why. Everything seems to be going great as I am now officially retired from the military, I got a great result on my VA disability claim, I have an amazing job that allows me to work from home, and my marriage is doing better than ever. Why am I struggling so much with this, Father? Please help me figure this out. The second is that I gave into temptation and watched porn for the first time in over a year. I don’t even know why I gave into temptation like that, but I felt sorry afterwards and wanted to make sure I journaled about it today. Please forgive me for both of these, Father. Help me to overcome these struggles I’m facing, but also to be a better man moving forward.
PROMISE (verses 15-16): Gideon’s response here is probably the exact same way I’d react in a similar scenario. He was essentially like, “me, really, Lord?! You’re choosing me over all of these other people who are much stronger than I am?!” You came through with a glorious promise for Your response, however. You told Gideon that You will be with him, so his people will be able to strike down Midian as if they were only one man! WOW! Being retired military, I can definitely understand Gideon’s nerves in this situation as he’s going up against a very destructive and powerful enemy per the Lord’s command. Hearing straight from You the reassurance that I should not worry because You are with me and I will be successful would be absolutely amazing.
ATTITUDE (verse 31): I find Gideon’s father’s response to the irate town members an amazing one. The town is infuriated over the fact that Gideon, Joash’s son, tore down and burned two altars to other gods but then also built a new altar and sacrificed to You. He did all of this overnight, which was likely a very smart strategy. Joash didn’t necessarily defend or endorse his son’s actions but took a different approach. He told them that if the god of these altars is real, then allow that god to plead their case and defend themselves. If who they built those altars for is a legitimate god, then wouldn’t they be upset that someone tore down their altar and built one to another God on top of it? Help me to embrace this attitude of defending You in a way that doesn’t strike up further outrage in myself nor others, Father. Joash brought peace, in a sense, to the situation and saved his son’s life in the same moment by giving this simple statement to the outraged town members. I must admit that I likely would not have had a similar reaction as I likely would have became heated in defending my son and probably said something to the effect of “if any of you touches my son, you will have me to deal with directly” and then slammed my door in their face. This is not the type of attitude You wish for me to have, so please help me, Father; help me to be a peace bringer in my life.
COMMAND (verse 10): This is a command that has been repeated so many times throughout scripture, yet the Israelites along with many others, including myself at times, has struggled to obey it always. You simply tell them to not fear the gods of the others as You are the one true God of the Israelites. You simply want us to have You as our #1 and for us to not worry about any of these false gods and idols all around us in this life. Help me to be better at this, Father, so that my life is not only a testimony to You, but also honoring to You in all that I do.
EXAMPLE (verses 36-40): I find Gideon’s way of verifying things from You kind of hilarious because I likely would have been the same. He was obviously in shock that You chose him to take on this seemingly monumental task as reflected in previous verses. Even after getting affirmation from You earlier in this scripture, in these verses he takes that to another level. He wants You to give validation that what he is about to do is exactly what You want him to do. In case the first one was a fluke of some type, he decided to do it again but in the opposite manner just to be safe. I find this funny because how often do I do this in my faith? It’s essentially asking the question “are you sure?” I know oftentimes I require validation of some type and I do feel like You always give that to me. I hope I am not overstepping nor is Gideon overstepping here when it comes to trusting in You because that is definitely not the intent. We are just nervous and a little frightened, so we want to make sure that what we are about to do is truly from You and with Your blessing.
*DAILY NOTE: It feels great getting back into my quiet times, Father. Today’s scripture spoke loudly to me because I feel as-if I am very similar to Gideon. He had his doubts, nerves, and fear. He couldn’t believe it was him that You were putting these difficult tasks on. You were always there to reassure him that what he was doing was sanctioned by You, blessed by You, and that You would be there with him throughout it all. Help me with my journey, Father. Please show me You reassurance that what I am doing in this life is sanctioned by You, blessed by You, and that You are there with me throughout my life. I do struggle quite a bit in my life, but knowing that You are there with me definitely makes it easier on me. Thank You for today’s conversation, Father. I really needed this.
EXPAND TO READ: GENERAL NOTE FOR MY QUIET TIMES
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